And another thing...

Poulter responds

And now today's Dog Bites Man moment ...

Stop the presses. Ian Poulter says he's been misquoted.

The goofy British golfer, ridiculed in the Blob yesterday for saying only he could challenge Tiger, claims now that he was"misquoted" and "taken out of context" in the March edition of Golf World UK. He said what he really said was that as long as Tiger was playing, no one would challenge him for supremacy.

Who knows. He might be telling the truth.

But as someone who's spent 30 years listening to guys who weren't misquoted claim they were, I am, shall we say, a raised eyebrow with feet.

-- Ben Smith

Supe prediction, Take 6

This one comes from rather, ah, far afield.

Randy Roberts, a Distinguished Professor of History at Purdue University, says in a recent release that the Patriots "will probably win fairly easily on Sunday."

He also labeled the Patriots a "dynasty" (right), said "Boston is not a big market like New York, Chicago or Los Angeles" (right but a bit disingenuous, considering the Boston market encompasses not just Boston but all of New England) and that "Boston has not always been passionate about its sports" (absolutely, positively wrong, wrong, wrong).

So when he says the Pats "will probably win fairly easily on Sunday," you can take it with the grain of salt it deserves.

Especially since I hear the chemistry department is going big for the Giants.

-- Ben Smith   

Bloodlines

Speaking of Brady, and the media lapsing into silliness during Super Bowl Week ...

I happened to see side-by-side photos of Joe Namath and Tom Brady while surfing the web this morning, and I was struck by something: They have the EXACT SAME dimple in their chins!

This suggests to me that Joe and Mrs. Brady perhaps knew each other more than casually. Or Joe and some unnamed woman knew each other more than casually (a distinct possibility, knowing Broadway Joe), after which young Tom, much like the young Moses, was placed in a basket of reeds and floated down the Nile.

Eventually he was discovered by Mr. and Mrs. Brady, who raised him to be the young god he is today. Not to mention the long-lost progeny of Joe Willie himself.

I mean, does anyone really think it's a COINCIDENCE that both Namath and Brady wear No. 12?

-- Ben Smith 

   

Supe prediction, Take 5

... which, once again, is not a prediction. But it is ABOUT a prediction.

Namely, Plaxico Burress' Namath-like call, which continues to keep the pot bubbling because the media tend to seize on any little thing during Super Bowl Week, no how matter how silly or tangential. There are two reasons for this.

Reason No. 1 is, we're the media and that's what the media does.

Reason No. 2, and I know this from having been there last year, we all run out of legitimate stuff to write about by Wednesday of Super Bowl Week. This leaves us four more days to write about nothing. So we do.

And so Burress' fun little prediction suddenly becomes a Story. And Tom Brady's good-humored response to it -- he gently chided Burress for only giving the Patriots 17 points -- becomes this headline on ESPN.com: "Brady Calls Out Burress."

He did no such thing. But again, this is what we do.

-- Ben Smith

Bite marks

The latest from our Somehow I Knew It Would Come To This file ...

High school wrestling is a world unto itself, bordered by sweat, defined by pain and framed by sacrifice. So maybe, in context, it's not as bizarre as it might have been that Mike Marshall, the wrestling coach at Central Cambria High near Pittsburgh, has been forced to resign.

For biting one of his wrestlers.

Yes, that's right, apparently Marshall was working the single-leg takedown, or something, with one of his wrestlers, when he suddenly treated the single leg like takeout. Bit the kid on the upper thigh -- not hard, but enough to bruise.

The student didn't want to prosecute and agreed to drop the matter if Marshall agreed to resign, which he did.

Marshall's attorney, meanwhile, called the incident "completely innocent," and devoid of malice.

You know what?

It probably was. I mean, stuff happens in wrestling, intended or otherwise. That's why it's a world unto itself.

Frankly I think they should have just docked the guy a couple of points and let him keep his job. But that's me.

-- Ben Smith

More Plaxico

Speaking of Plaxico Burress, he's getting bashed from all quarters for having the temerity to think the Giants will win the Super Bowl.

Here's what I think: Yes, talking smack in the presence of the Patriots is pretty much like poking a sleeping grizzly with a stick. Yes, he's gonna get somebody killed if he doesn't shut up, or, failing that, kill whatever chance for suspense there is in Super Bowl XLII.

But you know what?

I sure hope he thinks the Giants are going to win. I'd hate to think they'd come all the way out to Arizona just to finish second. And as I recall, the last time someone made such a bold and foolhardy prediction, it didn't turn out too badly for him.

Or perhaps you've forgotten about Joe Namath.

-- Ben Smith   

Hubris

Quiz time, boys and girls. Today's is multiple choice, and consists of just one question: "Who is Ian Poulter?"

A) A man who has lost his mind but thinks it just went to the bathroom for a minute.

B) What winds up on the page when a drunk tries to write "Ann Coulter."

C) A British golfer who thinks he's Plaxico Burress.

The correct answers are "A" and "C." And I don't know, maybe "B," too.

In truth, Poulter really is a British golfer, and even though no one but golf nerds know his name, the other day he was heard to say he's the only player in the world capable of challenging Tiger Woods.

"Don't get me wrong, I really respect every professional golfer," Poulter said in the upcoming issue of Golf World magazine's United Kingdom edition. "But I know I haven't played to my full potential and when that happens, it will be just me and Tiger."

Here's what's wrong with that statement, besides pretty much everything: The phrase "Me and Tiger" doesn't exist in golf. It's only "Tiger and then everyone else."

I mean, did Poulter even SEE what Tiger did at the Buick Invitational last weekend? He lapped the field, is what he did. He made the best golfers in the world look like they were playing an entirely different game. He played one tournament while everyone else played another.

This indeed makes Poulter look like Burress, who, last we saw, was doing everything in his power to see that his football team gets destroyed by the Patriots on Sunday. In fact Poulter was Burress squared, because at least most of us have actually HEARD of Burress. At least he's actually done something.

Poulter, on the other hand, is ranked, um, 22nd in the world. He didn't even make the 12-man European team for the 2006 Ryder Cup. He's pretty much a face on a milk carton.

What a world.

-- Ben Smith          

Farewell

Larry Smith, who grew up just down the road but made his reputation out West, died at 68.

Smith coached USC to Rose Bowl appearances in his first three seasons, and also coached at Arizona, Tulane and Missouri. But he grew up in Van Wert, an Ohio boy whose passion for football came honest and early.

"Any person who has ever grown up here, from the time they're old enough to know what's going on, knows Friday night in Ohio means high school football," Smith told Tom Timmermann of the Los Angeles Daily News back in 1990, when Smith's USC Trojans were getting ready to go to Columbus to play Ohio State. "When I was 6, 7 years old, I remember running around outside the fence at games. And then I remember sitting on a blanket in the bleachers watching a game.

"Growing up in that situation, you could go into any town or small city and know whether or not the local team was at home. If they were on the road, it was like a ghost town."

Sounds like high school hoops in Indiana. Well, once upon a time, anyway.

-- Ben Smith 

       

And the winner is ...

... the Mets!

Yes, that's right, the Amazins, who, despite all the noise about the Yankees and Red Sox, were probably the frontrunners all along in the Johan Santana Sweepstakes, have nailed down the big trade. It's Santana to the Mets for outfielder Carlos Gomez and pitchers Phil Humber, Deolis Guerra and Kevin Mulvey.

You gotta love it. As usual it was the Yankees and Red Sox dominating the headlines in all the chatter about Santana, and in the end it's That Other New York Team that slips in and scoops him. I find this refreshing. I also find it encouraging from the standpoint that, if the Yankees or Red Sox get Santana, it would have moved us one step closer to that theoretical day when YankeesRedSoxCorp would own every player in major league baseball.

Way to go, Mets. Somewhere Teddy Roosevelt, king of the trust-busters, is smiling on you.

-- Ben Smith         

Supe prediction, Take 4

Which is an actual prediction this time.

No doubt everyone in America already knows this -- for cryin' out loud, we know Bill Belichick's favorite film --  but Plaxico Burress has predicted a 23-17 Giants victory.

What do I think?

I think "Plaxico" is a way-cool name. Still.

As for the game, I think he's right. Someone will score 23 points. Someone will score 17 points. They might do it on the way to 28 or 31 or 38 points, but they'll do it.

And the winner will be the Giants. 'Cause if the Giants win, it'll be the Giants, and if the Patriots win and go 19-0, it'll be Giant, too.

OK, so I'm being silly. But I have an ulterior motive: I'm writing my prediction column for Sunday's Old Journalism version of the JG, and until then I'm not giving anything away. Sorry.

-- Ben Smith