I'm so excited. It's NFL combine week (you can always tell when it's coming; the stores in Indy all sell out of Lunesta, Prozac and straitjackets) and I've got a copy of Brady Quinn's Wonderlic test right here in my hot little hands.
The first question on it was, "What is your favorite color?"
Quinn answered "blue." The correct answer was "red."
The next question was "If you had a choice between lobster and steak, which would you choose?"
Quinn replied "steak." The correct answer was "both."
The next question was "Are you a happy person?"
Quinn said "yes." The correct answer was, "Are you nuts? This is NFL combine weekend. Nobody's happy about anything."
Ain't that the truth (and speaking of truth, in case you haven't already guessed it, I made up the whole Quinn-Wonderlic thing). It's a festival of lunacy, combine weekend, in which people who ought to be mumbling into their chest hair in a padded room somewhere instead obsess over tenths of a second and scores on a meaningless test instead of whether football players can actually play football.
Quinn's a good case in point. Once upon a time he was golden with the NFL geeks; now he's the man most likely to fall down an elevator shaft on draft day. Suddenly he can't do anything right. Suddenly Jamarcus Russell of LSU, the Beast of Baton Rouge, is everybody's fave because he's the size of a defensive end and can throw rockets -- and he beat Quinn in the Sugar Bowl.
Sure, Quinn hasn't helped himself any with his Greta Garbo act -- he skipped the Senior Bowl, and as of yesterday was a no-show for combine workouts -- and he didn't help his stock with a senior season in which his best games were all against Army, Navy and the Sisters of the Poor. But, come on, the guy can play, and so can half the other guys the NFL geeks are picking to death this weekend (See: USC wideout Dwayne Jarrett).
Reminds me of last year at this time, when the big news was that Vince Young had basically Freddied the Wonderlic. Of course, we all know how he then went on to be a HUGE failure his rookie year with Tennessee.
Not.
-- Ben Smith
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