Yoo-hoo. Over here.
In case you've been wondering where "And Another Thing ..." went, well, it's moved. Here is the new link.
(You may now respond in the appropriate fashion: "Ah, crud! I thought we'd finally gotten rid of him!").
-- Ben Smith
Remember how breathtaking the Olympic opening ceremonies were?
Well, you can have your breath back. Turns out they were a little TOO breathtaking.
Turns out, according to Bill Plaschke of the Los Angeles Times, that those Chinese and Olympic flags dramatically snapping in the wind were, um, snapping in a wind artificially created by fans or something planted in the flagpoles.
And the dazzling fireworks exploding above the Bird's Nest, the Olympic Stadium?
Turns out the Chinese digitially enhanced them to make them look more spectacular on TV than they actually were in person.
And the little girl who so sweetly sang "Ode to the Motherland"?
Turns out she was lip-synching, because the little girl who really sang the song was not as photogenic.
So a whole chunk of what you saw was fake, which makes you wonder about the rest of it, like the guy who ran around the rim of the stadium to light the cauldron. Did he really do that, or was that a digital enhancement, too?
The whole thing makes you wonder if Stephen Spielberg really should have been hired to choroegraph the ceremonies. After all, it would have right in the wheelhouse for the guy who gave the world the fake shark in "Jaws."
Looks like another world record has been set in Beijing.
Only five days in, and already these Games have, ahem, jumped the shark.
-- Ben Smith
In a blow to the Cult of the Six-Pack Abs, a new study reports that roughly 51 percent of overweight adults nationwide have normal blood pressure and cholesterol levels, while an astonishing number of awesomely fit people suffer from ailments usually associated with obesity.
Take that, Bowflex.
And pass the pie.
-- Ben Smith
This is already up on the Web, but the Wizards and San Diego Padres formalized continuing their agreement today. They're in their 10th season together this year.
Which means they've already outlasted most celebrity marriages.
-- Ben Smith
... in which a properly chastised Blobber, aka me, apologizes for his premature diss of the U.S. swimmers in Beijing.
Since I blogged yesterday that, outside of Michael Phelps, the U.S. swimmers had been getting their glutes kicked all over the Water Cube, they've been kicking back. Phelps won his third gold in laughable fashion, Aaron Peirsol defended his Olympic title in the 100 bacstroke in world-record time, and Natalie Coughlin became the first woman to repeat as champion of the women's 100 back.
I stand corrected. And properly chagrined.
-- Ben Smith
If Michael Phelps goes on to win his eight gold medals in this Olympics, he should give one of them to Jason Lezak.
Lezak's blistering final leg enabled the Americans to overhaul the French in world record time Sunday, winning the 400 freestyle relay and preserving Phelps' quest for eight golds.
Elsewhere, though ...
Well, I've gotta say, the much ballyhooed American swimmers aren't exactly sweeping the medal stand.
American star Katie Hoff has gotten dusted twice in two days, first by Australian rival Stephanie Rice in the 400 individual medley and then by Britain's Rebecca Adlington in the 400 freestyle, in which Hoff was a heavy favorite. The American women's 4x100 freestyle relay team was beaten for the gold by the Netherlands. And American Brendan Hanson was dethroned as world record holder in the 100 breaststroke by Kosuke Kitajima of Japan.
-- Ben Smith
Interesting piece Sunday in the dinosaur editions of the JG about performance enhancement and how it's actually a natural extension of human athletic performance.
The author (Andy Miah), advances the notion that technological advances in equipment, surgical techniques and training techniques have enabled athletes of today to achieve things athletes in previous generations, denied access to those advances, could not have dreamed. The natural extrapolation is that performance enhancing substances are just another technological advance.
I'm not sure I buy that entirely, but he makes a strong case -- not for the promotion of performance enhancing drugs, but for monitoring their use rather than trying to ban them. As he says, you can't do it; ultimately advances in the enhancement area -- the newest one is gene doping, which is impossible to prove or disprove -- will outstrip any testing procedures.
His solution, if I read him right, is to allow athletes to explore any options they wish for performance enhancement, provided it's regulated and is available to everyone.
Here's the problem with that, as I see it: Technology in the area of equipment advances and training techniques are one thing, advances in performance enhancing substances another. The former likely can be made available to everyone; witness the space-age swimsuit everyone's wearing a variation of in Beijing. The latter can never be made available to everyone, because someone's always going to have better chemists at their disposal.
So. As ineffective as anti-doping strategies are, and as increasingly ineffective as they're likely to become, the people who run international athletics have no choice. They have to continue to police it, because a level playing field isn't possible, if not feasible, any other way.
-- Ben Smith
I'll tell you right now when the U.S. men's basketball team -- nicknamed "The Redeem Team" this time around -- killed the skeptic in me.
It wasn't just the way they easily dismantled Yao Ming and the hometown Chinese today. it was what LeBron James had to say afterward -- and what he'd done before the U.S. even took the court.
What he said, in so many words, was that nothing he'd ever done could approach winning an Olympic gold medal, because he hadn't done anything yet. Which is what everyone on the team is saying. Which suggests to me the jaded, overpaid NBA players who make up the U.S. roster are actually buying into the whole Olympic thing for once.
Case in point: After Michael Phelps won his first gold medal in the 400 IM, one of the first text messages he received was from, yep, LeBron James, telling him how much Phelps' victory fired him up.
I like that. I like this team.
-- Ben Smith
Here's what we know now about the attack on two Americans in Beijing:
* The dead man is Todd Bachman, the father-in-law of U.S. men's coach Hugh McCutcheon.
* McCutcheon's wife, Elisabeth, was a 1994 Olympian on the U.S. women's volleyball team and was in the group when the assailant, who was Chinese, set upon them with a knife. Elisabeth Bachman McCutcheon was not injured, however.
* Read more here.
-- Ben Smith
Speaking of Beijing ... if you missed the opening ceremonies last night (and I'd understand if you did, since they lasted four hours, and nothing's good enough to last four hours), you missed some truly spectacular stuff.
Especially dazzling was the lighting of the Olympic cauldron, in which the torchbearer was hoisted aloft in some kind of harness and "ran" completely around the upper rim of the stadium before igniting the flame. Absolutely amazing.
And then ...
And then a dash of cold reality.
This morning comes the news that a relative of one of the U.S. men's volleyball coaches was killed in a brutal and apparently random attack by a knife-wielding Chinese man near the Drum Tower, a 13th-century Beijing landmark five miles from the Olympic site.
As I write this, the name of the coach to whom the dead man was related had not been released. As everyone undoubtedly knows, Woodburn native Lloy Ball is the senior member of the men's team, so I'll continue to try to pass on more details as they come.
Stay tuned.
-- Ben Smith
And the first gold medal for the U.S. in the Beijing Games belongs to ... a woman armed with a sword.
Specifically, Mariel Zagunis, who led a U.S. sweep of the medals podium in the women's saber. Zagunis was the defending gold medalist in the event.
So touche, or something.
-- Ben Smith
... about nothing. That was Charlie Weis' take on the whole Jimmy Clausen-beer-drinking-or-not internet photo controversy at media day today.
And I have to say this: Hooray for Charlie.
As I've noted before on the Blob, it should be a lesson to Clausen that when you're the quarterback at Notre Dame in the age of the ambush photo, NOTHING you do is above scrutiny and NO ONE should be trusted to be discreet. 'Cause they won't be.
That said ... a photo of a college kid hanging out with his friends and (maybe) drinking a beer does not exactly strike me as scandalous. What's the kid supposed to do, never venture outside his dorm room?
As Weis so well put it, carefully prefacing it by saying he didn't condone underage drinking: "Not to be sarcastic or anything, but give me a break."
Amen.
-- Ben Smith
So the answer to the question, "Can this marriage be saved?" is "Yes."
I refer to the marriage between Andretti Green Racing and Tony Kanaan, which for a long time this season looked as if it were headed for the same rocks that broke up the Packers and Brett Favre. Rumors that Kanaan and teammate Marco Andretti weren't getting along -- which got further fuel after Marco wrecked Kanaan at Indy and the two publicly disagreed about it -- ignited further rumors that Kanaan was headed elsewhere, possibly to Chip Ganassi.
Well, forget that. Today AGR announced it had locked up Kanaan for another five years. So there, rumor-mongers.
-- Ben Smith
Brett the Jet?!
To quote a former colleague: "What th--?"
After all the drama ... all the angst ... all the bitterness, phony sadness (on the part of the Packers) and seventh-grade schoolgirl indecision (on the part of Brett Favre), Favre winds up going to a team he initially rejected?
It bears repeating: "What th--?"
I don't know who wins here and who loses. But my instincts, and natural skepticism, make me see a double "L."
Favre's a loser because he's going to New York, where the media will be far less kind and the expectations far more outlandish than in Green Bay. Already there are people predicting the Jets will win nine or 10 games with Favre, which is laughable. They'll win seven, eight tops, miss the playoffs -- and guess who everyone will blame for that?
And the Packers?
The Packers lose because they've consciously run off their best quarterback (I'm sorry, that still boggles my mind) for petty reasons that don't hold up to any reasonable scrutiny. The prevailing wisdom that Favre's indecision somehow screwed up the Packers future plans is complete bunk. WHAT future plans?
Only a fool believes they've recast their entire offense around the talents of Heir-on Rodgers, who's never taken a significant snap. This is still Mike McCarthy's system, and I doubt seriously he's completely revamped it.
And if you think Favre not deciding to come back until after Draft Day affected the Packers' drafting strategy, you're dreaming, too. Yeah, they took two young quarterbacks, but there's absolutely nothing to suggest they wouldn't have done so anyway even if Favre had announced he wanted to come back before draft day. I mean, he's 38 years old. You're gonna tell me the Packers' weren't looking to a future without him in any case?
Bottom line is, Ted Thompson has bet all his chips on the idea that Favre was finished as an effective quarterback. For his sake, let's hope that doesn't make him the next Jerry Krause, who prematurely pulled the plug on the Jordan-Pippen-Jackson dynasty in Chicago.
-- Ben Smith
So now Brett Favre WON'T be back with the Packers, and has in fact left town.
And now Mike McCarthy -- who first said Heir-on Rodgers was his quarterback, and then said there would kinda-sorta be an open competition between Heir-on and Favre -- is again saying Heir-on is his guy.
And now rumors are flying that the Bays, Green and Tampa, are about to cut a deal that will send Favre to Vikings via Tampa -- which apparently is now his only option other than re-retiring, which is also apparently an option again.
I think I have a headache.
Or not. Or I thought I did but I've changed my mind. Or I will tomorrow, unless I don't.
Is it OK if I scream now?
-- Ben Smith
We're two days from the lighting of the torch in Beijing, but already the Olympic festivities have begun.
Protesters today unveiled a pro-Tibet banner in Tiananmen Square. This was after the Chinese revoked the visa of Olympic gold medalist and Darfur activist Joey Cheek.
Let the Games begin.
And the unmasking of the Chinese.
-- Ben Smith
I knew you couldn't wait any longer -- come on, what's five minutes without a Brett Favre fix? -- so here's the latest from As The Brett Turns:
Today, after a five-hour meeting with head coach Mike McCarthy, he's concluded it's probably not gonna work out with the Packers.
Gee, Brett. What was your first clue?
-- Ben Smith
I listen to entirely too much sports yap on the radio. Consider it a moral failing.
That said, you'd think I'd be immune to going off every time I hear one of the yapheads say something incredibly stupid, which they tend to with such regularity I've always suspected it was written into their contracts ("Article 39-B Sub-Section D: You must make a minimum of three incredibly stupid utterances per hour"). But yesterday Colin Cowherd said something that nearly made me drive off the road.
What he said was that based on what he saw Sunday night, the Indianapolis Colts would not make the playoffs.
Based on what he saw Sunday night?!
What did he see, besides Jim Sorgi playing quarterback and Colt Brennan lighting up the Colts' third-stringers? Besides Joseph Addai playing, what, one snap? Excuse me?
Hey, Colin, based on what I saw Sunday night, Colt Brennan's gonna be the MVP of the league this year. And the Redskins are gonna win the Super Bowl. And the Colts won't win a game.
Based on what he saw Sunday night?!
Well, gee, based on what I saw in the 15 minutes of practice I watched at Bishop Luers yesterday, I'm not sure the Knights can get out of the sectional.
Which is MY incredibly stupid utterance for the day.
-- Ben Smith
We're still a month away from the official start of the season, but already the college football Miscreant Watch is off to a rousing start.
(And, no, I'm not talking about Jimmy Clausen getting tagged in a photo apparently drinking beer with friends. Or at least hanging out with friends who were drinking beer. Hey, I know he's a Notre Dame football player. I know that means he's got to show better judgment, especially in the age of the ambush cellphone photo. But he's also a college kid, not a monk. You think Joe Montana or Terry Hanratty never drank a beer in college?).
Where was I again?
Oh, yeah. The Miscreant Watch.
It begins today in Athens, Ga.
Folks down that way were proud as punch that the Georgia Bulldogs are everybody's preseason No. 1, until they discovered that "No. 1" was apparently short for "No. 1579245," or something comparable. So far head coach Mark Richt has suspended six players for the 'Dogs opener for infractions ranging from public urination to trashing a hospital lobby.
Read this. And then tell me if it doesn't make you wonder who's running No. 1's show, Richt or the inmates.
-- Ben Smith
By now you may know (or not) the story of Becky Hammon, the born-and-bred South Dakota native who, through a fluke in the rules, is playing basketball for the Russians in the Olympics.
In the first meeting between her adopted country and her native one, Hammon scored 10 points as the Russians got rolled, 93-58. The American players downplayed the fact that Hammon was playing -- even the American coach, Anne Donovan, who earlier publicly called Hammon a traitor.
My reaction was then, and still is, that Donovan was being a jerk.
After all, Hammon's only playing for the Russians because the Americans (and Donovan) didn't want her, not even including her in the 29-player pool of prospects even though Hammon's been a standout in the WNBA. So Hammon, who plays in a Russian league in the winter as a naturalized citizen, decided to play for Russia -- which, unlike the U.S. team, welcomed her as an Olympian.
She admits it's weird. She says she's still an American, and, indeed, when they played the Star-Spangled Banner today, she put her hand over her heart just like the American players did. She says she's playing for the Russians only because it was her only chance to play in the Olympics.
Maybe you, like Donovan, can find fault with that. Not me.
-- Ben Smith
It's official. The Brett and the Restless has knocked off "The Guiding Light" as the world's longest-running soap opera.
When last we left Brett, outsiders (i.e., me) were speculating as to whether, deep down, he really, really wanted to still play football. Meanwhile, Lydia was in a coma, Rance had been busted for selling cocaine to undercover rodeo clowns and young Dr. Frankenstein was having an affair with Loretta Von Benjamins, heiress to the vast Von Benjamins' wheat germ fortune ...
OK, OK. So here's what's really going on:
* Last night, Brett flew into Green Bay to a hero's welcome, sort of.
* His heir apparent, Heir-on Rodgers, played like a major goof in a team scrimmage in front of the whole city.
* Packers coach Mike McCarthy said Heir-on was not, in fact, his starter (like he said before), but would compete with Favre for the starting job (like he's saying now). In other words, the man who has defined the Packers for 16 years would get a shot at the starting job, just to be fair and all.
All together now: Huh?
I'm sorry, but this has all gotten too bizarre for me. I mean, here the Packers have a first-ballot Hall of Famer who still wants to play and still has skills, but the Packers just want him to go away and leave them alone. Instead, they clearly prefer Rodgers, who's never taken a meaningful snap in his life.
Meanwhile, God only knows what's going to happen when Lydia wakes up.
-- Ben Smith
I know I've bored Blob Nation to tears with all my hand-wringing and angst over my willfully under-achieving Pittsburgh Pirates. But permit me one more wring of the hands.
See what happened last night, the first after the big deal that sent Manny Ramirez to L.A., a bunch of kids to Pittsburgh and Pirates All-Star Jason Bay to Boston?
Yes, that's right. In his first game as a Red Sox, Bay tripled with two out and then scored the winning run in extra innings.
Of course.
-- Ben Smith
I know I can't get through a day without a Brett Favre update, and if I can't I know the Blobophiles can't.
So here it is, in all its extreme scariness: I think I have Brett's brain figured out.
Half of it wants to play again because playing is all he's ever known, and so the desire to play is like some sort of reflex over which he has no control. The other half is beginning to come to terms with the fact that the end of the road, which arrives for everyone no matter how much everyone wants to deny it, is finally here.
That's why I think Favre and the Packers will eventually agree on the marketing package they're currently trying to hammer out. Favre might say he still wants to play, but that's the reflex talking. I really don't think he wants to play badly enough to do it for anyone but Green Bay, and that's not an option. So it's really a matter of how much money it will take to silence the reflex once and for all.
I know, it sounds nuts. But that's what I think is going on.
-- Ben Smith
And on the telecommunications front ...
Apparently Kelvin Sampson isn't the only one in collegiate athletics who has phone issues.
What I want to know this:
1. When did Kelvin move to Memphis?
2. Did he leave a forwarding address for Scott Skiles, who hired him as a Milwaukee Bucks assistant?
Because, you know, bailing on Skiles without telling him would have been really wrong. And we know what an aversion Kelvin has to doing wrong.
-- Ben Smith
Well, it's over, boys and girls. Multiple sources are reporting that Manny Ramirez is now a Los Angeles Dodger, traded in a three-way deal that leaves my Pittsburgh Pirates holding the bag again.
The deal sends Ramirez -- last seen holding up a sign in the dugout saying he'd approve a trade to Green Bay for Brett Favre -- to the Dodgers in exchange for one of the Bucs' few remaining stars, Jason Bay. The Pirates, per usual, get four minor-leaguers.
And so once again my Buccos' ownership reveals itself to be a bunch of quitters. First they send Xavier Nady to the Yankees for a couple of missing persons; now they ship Bay to Boston for a few more missing persons.
All I can say is what I always say when the Pirates do this: If their owners want to be major league owners, act like it. Quit demeaning the Pirates' proud legacy by treating them as a de facto farm team. If you can't do that -- if you want to behave like bush-leaguers -- sell the team and buy, say, the Wisconsin Timber Rattlers.
Whew. I feel better now.
-- Ben Smith
NASCAR Post Ahead ...
And here's a piece of breaking news that isn't exactly news: Sources are reporting that Ryan Newman has agreed to pilot the second car for Stewart/Haas Racing next year.
Newman's name has been at the top of everyone's list as new owner Tony Stewart's teammate ever since it was announced he wouldn't be back with Roger Penske. No one's still admitting it, but apparently the deal is either done or close to being done.
-- Ben Smith
This just in: The Indianapolis Colts' third-round draft pick from 2007, defensive lineman Quinn Pitcock, has apparently decided to retire.
This will come as a shock to anyone not familiar with the toll playing professional football exacts on a human body, even one still as young and resilient as the 24-year-old Pitcock's. As seductive as the game obviously is to those who play it, it also demands an almost inhuman level of commitment sometimes.
Pitcock clearly decided it wasn't for him. Ridicule him all you want for walking away from the glamour life of a pro athlete, but at least he'll still be walking 20 or 30 years from now. Which is more than can be said for some of his now-former teammates.
-- Ben Smith
Annika Sorenstam is as right as single-malt Scotch. Michelle Wie needs a new agent.
Once again, for reasons known only to Wie and her parents, who handle her affairs, she's off to play in a PGA event, this time skipping an LPGA major to do so. As I've said before on the Blob and elsewhere, I think she has every right to do this, unless I woke up in Iran or North Korea today. And yet, what she and her parents are thinking is beyond me.
Wie has struggled to make cuts and be competitive on the LPGA tour the last few years, let alone on the PGA Tour. Her game reeks of a lack of confidence. Yet she picks now to go play against the men again?
If her confidence was in a wad before, just wait until this weekend's over. Mismanaged doesn't begin to describe what's happening to her career.
-- Ben Smith
This just in: Dirty NBA ref Tim Donaghy got 15 months slam-time today, a hefty sentence considering he flipped on two other defendants in the worst NBA officiating scandal ever.
And if you think sending Donaghy up the river closes the book on that scandal, think again. Given that shamed refs Joey Crawford and Bennett Salvatore were allowed to officiate in the Finals this year, you can pretty much bet there's more out there that hasn't yet come to light. Stay tuned.
-- Ben Smith
NASCAR Post Ahead ...
And I promise, this is my last word on Sunday's Debacle at the Brickyard.
And, yes, debacle is the right word. Especially when it looks more and more like the fallout from NASCAR's re-enactment of the 2005 U.S. Grand Prix is just getting started.
For a taste of it, check out this guy's blog here.
Note especially the e-mail from the lady who said her family burned up $1,500 and three days of vacation only to get farce in return. Her comment that next year they'll go to the beach instead ought to send chills down the spine of Brian France and every other NASCAR honcho.
That's the worst part of all this for NASCAR: The timing. Maybe if the economy was flush and NASCAR was still cresting, a catastrophe like Sunday would only be a blip on the radar. But with the economy tanking and attendance down as a result -- and the sport already in something of a flat-line trajectory -- what happened Sunday couldn't have come at a worse time. And never mind that it happened in one of the sport's two biggest events, at the most storied venue in all of motor racing.
"The track won't change next year," a clearly steamed Tony George told the Indianapolis Star Monday, in a quote picked up by Terry Blount of ESPN.com. "So if (NASCAR) wants to come back, they better figure it out because I don't think the fans want to come back and see that.
"Figuring it out will only come with getting the car and tire combination right, and that requires actually spending the time and effort to do something about it."
In other words: Get your act together, boys. And as the blogger suggests, maybe reconsidering the tire manufacturer would be a good start. Or at the very least, bring in a second tire-maker so there's actual competition instead of the monopoly there is now.
-- Ben Smith
Back home again from Indianapolis, after a long, strange and disastrous day, PR-wise, for the NASCAR boys. And now that I've had a chance to sleep on it a bit, I have a few takes.
* I know I gave NASCAR a pass in this morning's dinosaur editions, saying that at least everyone worked together to put on a race, or a quasi-race, unlike the debacle that was the 2005 U.S. Grand Prix. In hindsight, though (which is always 20-20, as Robin Pemberton of NASCAR helpfully told us yesterday), I'm wondering if what NASCAR gave us Sunday was all that much different.
Like Michelin in 2005, after all, Goodyear brought a tire that didn't work. Like Michelin in 2005, it underestimated just how severe the problem was until it was too late to do anything about it. And like 2005, we consequently got farce or something very like it.
Steve Letarte, Jeff Gordon's crew chief, said that at least NASCAR wasn't like Formula One, which gave the fans "nothing." Technically, that's not true. F1, like NASCAR, did put on a race in 2005. It was an absurd race, but it was a race -- which is pretty much the same description you can apply to yesterday.
Six cars going around and around; mandated cautions every 10 laps. Esthetically, what's the difference?
* The effect of the economy on NASCAR -- on all discretionary spending, frankly -- has been an ongoing story all season. And I don't know if this was anything but coincidence or, at best, andecotal evidence, but it sure looked as if the economy took a bite out of NASCAR Sunday.
I say this after seeing bare aluminum -- lots of bare aluminum -- in the north and south short chutes stand and Northwest Vista seating. Empty seats have become more and more prevalent the last few years at the Brickyard, but there were considerably more in evidence this time around.
Again, I can't say if this was economy-related or simply a pointed commentary on what a lousy venue Indianapolis is for stock cars. But it was pretty jarring.
* If Sunday taught NASCAR anything, it's that it MUST reinstate an open test at Indy. Pemberton and Greg Stucker of Goodyear claimed it wouldn't have made any difference, but out of the other side of their mouths they were admitting that some procedures would change for next year. Which to me suiggested that the return of an open test at Indy is imminent.
-- Ben Smith, The Journal Gazette
INDIANAPOLIS -- I swear, you never know who you're gonna run into at this place.
Former colleagues. Actors from "Scrubs" (take a bow, John C. McGinley). Running backs from IU.
"Excuse me?" you're saying now.
You heard me. Roaming around media center today, I bumped into Bryan Payton, the former Concordia star and current Indiana star-in-waiting. He was here, believe it or not, not as a spectator, but as a member of the working press, covering the Allstate 400 at the Brickyard for the Indiana Daily Student.
It's his first big assignment, he told me, and, yes, he does know a little about it. His girlfriend got him into NASCAR some time ago; he now professes an affinity for Jeff Gordon and Jimmie Johnson. His plan, he says, is to go into print journalism as a magazine or newspaper writer.
"It's been just a great experience," he said. "This is definitely the biggest thing I've done so far, being that I just started in May. It opens my mind about other stuff I would like to cover."
On the football side, Payton, a redshirt junior, returns to camp for IU next Sunday. Typically, he has big plans on the gridiron this year, too.
"There's no doubt in our minds that we're gonna get a bowl game this year," he said. "I don't know how many games we're gonna win; that's ultimately up to us and how we're gonna play. I definitely we're capable of winning more than seven games.The way I see it, if we win seven games again in my mind, that's a little bit of a failure.
"The Insight Bowl was great, I loved Arizona, they were awesome to us, but I don't want to go back. I want to go to Pasadena, I want to go to Orlando, I want to go somewhere different. We're more than capable of doing that."
-- Ben Smith
INDIANAPOLIS -- I don't know who's going to win today, though I picked Kyle Busch. And I picked him precisely because of what he did last night.
In case you missed it, he won the Nationwide event over at O'Reilly Raceway Park, his record 15th victory in all series this year. And actually, win isn't quite the word. What he did was drive off and leave everyone else, leading 197 of the 200 laps. He was running his own race, and all the other schlubs were running theirs.
Love him or hate him, what he's doing is remarkable. And for those of you who say it's all because he's got that muscular Toyota under him ... well, he did it last night in the down-powered Toyota mandated by NASCAR last week. So there.
-- Ben Smith
INDIANAPOLIS -- And while we're updating stuff, the latest from the Brett Favre Network (BNN): Apparently Brett is not going to show up at the Packers camp after all.
This after the Packers have told him in every possible way that they don't want him there.
I still find it utterly amazing that the Packers are treating one of the greatest players in their history like a communicable disease, less than six months after he nearly led them to the Super Bowl. I know the guy's a pain. I know he's played these retire-or-not games with them before. I know he makes the Packers brass want to pull their hair out ... or maybe his.
But, still. He's Brett Favre, not a disposable lighter. How can you be so eager to turn the keys over to Aaron Rodgers that you're essentially tell No. 4 that he's dead to you?
-- Ben Smith
INDIANAPOLIS -- The start of the Brickyard 400 is a few hours off yet, so I thought this would be a good time to fill in all five of you who are still following the Tour de WhoCares:
* Carlos Sastre of Spain wrapped up the 2008 Tour de France title in a time trial yesterday, unless he falls off his bike on the generally ceremonial last stage today.
* Cheater tally to date: Three riders have been kicked out for doping so far.
* Top American is Christian Vande Velde, who's currently fifth.
That is all.
-- Ben Smith
.
INDIANAPOLIS -- OK, confession time. I'm not exactly objective about the Allstate 400 at the Brickyard this weekend.
(Yeah, I hear you out there. "When are you ever?" Very funny, smart guy).
Anyway, if you're asking me who I think is going to win Sunday, I'd have to go with the hot hand, Kyle Busch, or maybe the two guys who know their way around this place best, Tony Stewart and Jeff Gordon. But if you asked me who I'd LIKE to see win, there's only one answer: Mark Martin.
One, he's 49 years old. Two, he's one of the best human beings breathing air. Three, it would be something in the way of a payback from the fates after getting the rug pulled out from under him in the last 150 yards or so at Daytona in 2007.
Four, I like his attitude.
"Absolutely," he said Friday, when asked if stepping away from the sport on a full-time basis has given him a fresh perspective on things. "I did this stuff for 19 years, and you get ground down into the ground. And I got to step back and caught my breath and did the things i couldn' do before and was frustrated because I didn't have time to do them.
"Now I've stepped back, I've caught my breath and I've done all those things. I feel like I've got it all now. I felt like my life was one-sided and lopsided before. Now I feel like it's come a complete circle in every aspect."
How do you not like that?
-- Ben Smith
INDIANAPOLIS -- And now the latest Brett Favre news, because, hey, who doesn't want to hear Brett Favre news?
(Seriously, if this bizarre little psychodrama goes on much longer, someone will launch the Brett News Network, or BNN. All Brett, all the time. Brett 24/7. Applications for the anchor slots are now being accepted).
Anyway ... the latest is that the Buccaneers and Jets have asked for permission to talk to Brett. Meanwhile, Brett is threatening to show up for the Packers' training camp tomorrow.
More as the story develops. Or not.
-- Ben Smith
INDIANAPOLIS -- Down here at the Speedway for the NASCAR boys this weekend, but before I get into any of that ... welcome to today's Gratuitously Self-Indulgent Blob Take.
Which is: It's bad enough being a fan of a hopelessly inept baseball team. But when that team doesn't even know how to dress, it's just salt in the wound.
I'm referring, of course, to my Pirates, who by some miracle of the modern age actually turned up on TV last night under the misleading name "Major League Baseball." And they were wearing ... red. Red sleevelss uniform top over the traditional black long-sleeved undershirt.
OK, first let me state the obvious. The Pirates' colors are black and gold. Not red. Not, not, not. Red is for the Reds. Red is for the Red Sox and IU basketball and the Soviet hockey team. Red is not for the descendants, faint as the historic link may be these days, of Roberto Clemente and Pops Stargell.
I'm not generally a proponent of violent retribution -- if you believe it works, you've seen too many movies -- but whoever had the idea of outfitting my Bucs in these hideous threads should be flogged. Repeatedly.
That is all.
-- Ben Smith
Good news, Cubs fans: Dallas Mavericks' owner Mark Cuban has apparently made the first cut in the Who Wants To Own The Lovables Sweepstakes.
As I've said before in both the Blob and the dinosaur editions, I think Cuban owning the Cubs would be the best thing to hit baseball since Morganna the Kissing Bandit. The game needs new blood and a certain element of wackiness. No one would better provide both.
-- Ben Smith
And speaking of geezers overstaying their welcome ...
Joe Paterno addressed the question of his retirement at the Big Ten football confab today. And addressed it, and addressed it.
So many times was he asked about it, in fact, that he finally blew up at one reporter and spelled out the words "I d-o-n-t k-n-o-w" in response to the question. He may well have a timeline for calling it quits, in his heart of hearts. But he's keeping it to himself if he does.
Frankly I think his timeline is I'll-Quit-When-They-Pry-My-Cold-Dead-Hands-From-This-Whistle." After which he'll have himself cryogenically frozen, ala Ted Williams, and return to the sideline when science figures out how to reverse the aging process.
Then we'll have JoePa to kick around for another century or so. I can't wait.
-- Ben Smith
Copyright 2007 -- The Journal Gazette
